need <\/em>for your wedding is to make vows and sign the register.<\/p>\n\n\n\nYet we continue. Because that\u2019s how it\u2019s always been done. Because that\u2019s what everyone else does.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But it\u2019s totally understandable. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Maybe you don\u2019t know where to start with your plans. So you turn to media outlets for help, ideas, and advice. But the trouble is: they uphold the importance of a “perfect day” and are eager to make you worry your wedding won’t match up. So rather than risk getting it wrong, it seems safe to stick to the norm.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Or perhaps you just don’t know what you want. Even the most self-aware among us can still unconsciously accept what we believe and hush our intuition – and as a result, follow a tried and tested path. Noticing this in ourselves is tough.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And even if you do have a clear idea of which traditions are for you and which aren’t, it’s hard to go against the grain. You might meet resistance and disapproval from other people – and it takes courage to brave that and stay true to yourself – especially if someone else is paying.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But now more than ever, it\u2019s time to question everything<\/em>. It\u2019s time to stop unconsciously <\/em>following traditions, think about why we\u2019re doing things, think about what makes us<\/em> happy, and be ourselves. <\/p>\n\n\n\nWhy do I care so much?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Well, as a documentary wedding photographer, I\u2019ll capture the feelings<\/em> of your day, so you can relive every moment. So all the emotions you experience on the day will come back when you look at your photos. Take a first-dance photo. The picture may be aesthetically beautiful, but if you ignored your dislike for being in the spotlight because “everyone does a first dance” – and then spent the entire dance feeling awkward … guess how you\u2019ll feel when you look at the photo? <\/p>\n\n\n\nYou deserve photos you love. Photos that make you feel good, and like you. And that starts with planning a wedding that’s you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Wishing you the courage to invent traditions that honor who you are and what you value. To set and maintain your boundaries. And the self-awareness to know what that is.<\/em> And in doing so, give other couples permission to do the same. Because you deserve more than a wedding day timeline of traditions. You deserve a day that\u2019s nothing but love.<\/p>\n\n\n\nThe wedding traditions I ship <\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Now, let\u2019s not get too hasty and knock wedding traditions completely.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Because no matter how things change, traditions are symbolic. They remain constant, bring us comfort, and keep us close to our loved ones even when we\u2019re apart. There\u2019s nothing like a big ol\u2019 dose of nostalgia.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But only when you\u2019ve intentionally chosen the traditions because they\u2019re right for you<\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\nFor me? There are definitely some wedding traditions I can get behind. Cake? Brilliant idea. But saving the top tier of the wedding cake? Er, not likely. And I find some traditions totally weird. Breaking cake over the couple\u2019s heads? Hard pass.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
How to make wedding traditions your own <\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Traditions are best when they\u2019re meaningful to you. So start there. Does the idea make you feel good, happy, and excited? If it feels good to you, go for it. If not, toss the tradition. And if you\u2019re unsure, ask yourself \u201cwhy, why, why …\u201d over and over until you get to your underlying thoughts.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And remember, it\u2019s not just about dropping traditions. You can also twist an old classic or start a completely new tradition.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Here are some super special adaptations my couples have served up. I hope they give you some inspo to make your wedding you<\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n- Want a warm and loving twist on being given away? Try these words: \u201cWho gives their blessing on this marriage on behalf of the family?\u201d<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n
\n- Want to involve loved ones? Frame photos of your VIPs cutting their wedding cake next to your wedding cake.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n
\n- Want to celebrate as only you can? Think about the ways you usually mark a special occasion. For Vicki, this was a chocolate wedding cake baked by her mum who made chocolate cake for any celebration as she was growing up. Birthdays, Christmas, family get-togethers \u2026 always celebrated with chocolate cake.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n
\n- Not into a romantic first dance? Pick a fast track and get everyone on the dancefloor together. Or do something completely different like a first roll of the dice at a pop-up casino or a first scoop from the ice cream bike.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n
\n- Want your say on the day? Brides making speeches. Couples making joint speeches. Mums making a speech. This is your wedding. Your rules!<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n
\n- Not into allocating sides \u2026 Let your guests pick a seat.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n
\n- Don\u2019t want to walk down the aisle to Canon in D? Ask your organist to play the title track of the first movie you went to see together. Or anything that feels special to you!<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n
\n- Want to get ready together? Pah – stuff tradition and do it! Do what makes you both feel good.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n
\n- Nature lover? Do more outdoors and have your first dance, cake-cutting, and speeches outside. It\u2019s very untraditional in the UK, but if the weather plays ball, you\u2019ll love it.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n